VOTD

"Live a life filled with love for others, following the example of Christ, who loved you and gave himself as a sacrifice to take away your sins. And God was pleased, because that sacrifice was like sweet perfume to him."

Ephesians. 5:2, NLT

Damage vs. Damaged

I was talking to Pastor Tim last night and the topic of "damaged people" came up.  He made a point that I thought was interesting.  He cautioned me to avoid using the term damaged and suggested that I simply say that there is damage.  The difference is that to call someone damaged is to imply a degree of permanence.  It also can imply that the person is in some way defective.  Both are, of course, not true for the Christian.  Jesus provides healing for our heart and soul and only our rewards in heaven are permanently part of us.

Before I forget, we found an egg hunt for Easter for Noah.  The Ridge Church (our church) is having one after the service Sunday (yes, it would have been nice if they had publicized this :P )  Hopefully the weather is nicer than the current forecast.

Anyway, I have decided that while I have hurts and have taken damage (some caused by others and quite a lot caused by my own choices), I am not damaged.

blessings on your day

Sacred Marriage

We started reading the book Sacred Marriage last night.   What a great book this is :o)   A warning though, it isn't for those who are looking for light, fluffy or easy.  The premise of the book is "What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?"

This a radical concept even among the most mature Christians.  The book starts by examining the idea that Hollywood promotes regarding the whole "love is a feeling and romance is the cornerstone."   As we work through the book (I freely admit this one will take us awhile), I will share snippets and concepts as well as provide a regular review of the material.  We will probably start the books by Barbara Wilson (a local from Bayside Church in Granite Bay) next.  She wrote a couple of excellent books dealing with breaking free from bondage and restoring intimacy in the marriage.

What is on YOUR reading list?

Turn Around

I started commenting on one of Andy's posts (see link to the right) and decided the topic was worthy of more than just a comment.

Andy wrote: "See it isn't the outward obedience, its a heart issue"

Yeah, that is always the case. There are many Christians that look good on the outside. They stand in the assembly, serve in the church and are praised by their peers. Yet they do it only for recognition and acclaim.  It is about looking good, maintaining the image, the status and sadly, feeling good about themselves.  Of them, Jesus will say on the last day "I never knew you."

It is far easier to change the outward appearance than to work a genuine and lasting change in the heart. This requires surrender which is something many Christians just can't do.  I have struggled with this for years.  I have looked good on the outside while the inside was rotting.  Now I am starting to turn that inside out.  As I become transparent and genuine, my outside looks rotten.  At the same time, my heart is undergoing restoration, renewal and rebirth.  I find that some people pull back and withdraw in the face of my revelations while some step forward and embrace me.  Regardless of the reaction, I choose to continue this journey.

I also recognize that I have far indeed yet to travel.  Some days the heart change drives my decisions - other days it seems like my old heart is back.   Through it all, however, I refuse to surrender.   I give you the lyrics to my (current) favorite Skillet song - Awake and Alive

I’m awake I’m alive
Now I know what I believe inside
Now it’s my time
I’ll do what I want ’cause this is my life
here, right now
I’ll stand my ground and never back down
I know what I believe inside
I’m awake and I’m alive

Wandering

I feel like I am wandering aimlessly today.   I look back and list out what I have accomplished and I was actually fairly productive but at the same time I know I can do better.  I researched the book I mentioned below and it is actually cheaper on B&N (eBook) than anywhere else so I may just go ahead and download it to my Nook.  I need to leave in a little bit and go pick up Noah.  He spent the day with my mom & dad today.  My men's group has moved to Mondays for a while (Rich is taking salsa lessons on Tuesdays) so will have to stay on task and get the boy his allergy shots before dinner.

Still haven't found an Easter Egg hunt that we can attend.  Since we canceled the Clovis trip we are suddenly without plans (at least plans that include finding eggs).  I am looking forward to starting the book tonight when I get home (if Emma is still up).

Have a good evening, keep looking up and we will chat again tomorrow.

New Look

I was playing with the blogger templates Friday.  I get bored with things (especially techie things) and decided it was time for a change.   After changing the page design a dozen times, I settled on this one.  Let me know what you think. 

We had a nice weekend and got quite a lot done around the house.  The lawns got edged mowed and fertilized and the garage got straightened, organized and cleaned.   I still haven't got the garden planted yet, hopefully I can get tomatoes in the ground next Saturday.

Sunday we had out last care group session for the current study.  We will reconvene in 3 weeks for a potluck and to kick off a new study.  I think Emma and I are going to do Sacred Marriage on our own in the meantime.   The service Sunday was really good, love hearing Tim preach.  I need to find someplace that has an Easter Egg hunt this year as our church doesn't have their own facility and is probably a little small and  new to do that yet.

Emma spent some time on the 'puter trying to see if we can get Pop out here for a couple of weeks in June.  Airfare has really gone up this year, it is almost impossible to go anywhere on the east coast for less than $350.

This week the rain is back which is definitely a mixed blessing.   While we need the water and it is nice that no games will be rained out it is going to drive all the kids indoors for spring break.  I hope you all have a blessed day.

Untie Me!

As the regular reader is aware, I am going through a daily "survival" calender my kids gave me for Christmas.  I have learned all sorts of things so far - like how to get away from an alligator and all about piranhas.

Today I learned How To Escape When Tied Up.  I have to admit, as a fan of the crime/action shows, I can see how this would be useful.  While I certainly am not planning to get tied up soon, if any terrorists ever kidnap me, I am ready :D

Absolutes

Seeing as how it is closing in on Easter, I thought the following quote might be apprpriate for discussion

      The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.  - Flannery O'Connor

It is similar to Pilate's question as recorded in the Gospels when he snapped back at Jesus "What is truth?!"   God deals in absolutes which often offends people.  Our culture would take O'Connor's quote and invert it (the truth ALWAYS changes....).  The answer from the current generation to Pilate might be "truth can be whatever you want it to be."

Truth isn't mutable nor is it relative.  It doesn't change depending on the person or circumstances.  Truth is an absolute.  It is common for us to run up against "truths" that are uncomfortable or even down-right painful.  We are confronted with the Word and want to argue that it doesn't apply in our situation or circumstance (or even to US at all).  I have struggled with this on more than one occasion and I know many others that have as well.  There are Truths in God's Word that force us to examine our priorities, our actions or even who we are.

Sometimes I find myself broken and bleeding as a result - other times I try to hide and pretend the hard Truths don't exist.  Long term, the former is of more value than the latter.  At least if I break, I can heal, mend and change.  Turning your back on the Truth is never a good idea.  I have been very fortunate that my God doesn't give up on me and waits patiently for me to unstop my ears, turn and embrace the Truth no matter how painful.

Today I embraced a painful truth - there are some environments that are too stressful and painful for me to spend much time in.   Sometimes you can jump in an ice-cold lake, splash around briefly and climb out without taking any lasting harm.  But jumping into that same lake and trying to swim across it may result in hypothermia, cramps and even death.  So after careful consideration I have decided that we won't be spending the Easter holiday in Clovis.   Someday when I am stronger and healthier, I may be able to make a different choice.

blessings on your day

Status Check

The last few weeks have been a severe test of my resolve as well as a huge struggle.  Sometimes when you are on the battlefield, it is tough to focus on the long term goals or even recognize who the enemy truly is.  There are still a lot of things that are left to be dealt with - a few of them pretty significant.  As I confront these "biggies" I find that I withdraw and bring back out the masks.   What I am discovering is that the process of trying to hide from the pain weakens my defenses and lets the enemy through my walls.  The end result is a time of fierce struggle.

The solution, of course, is to meet the issues head on and work/walk through them.  Yeah, easier said than done, eh?   I know that there are some of you out there reading this that have struggles and pain in your life as well.  Part of growing, it seems, means spending a lot of time in the refiner's fire.  Being purged and purified is oh so painful.  The need to step out of the fire, turn my back and shout "no more!" is overwhelming at times.  At the same time I know in my heart that this is necessary.  Health, healing and maturity don't come for free and I know that my Lord will provide the strength and resolve that I need to continue this journey.

blessings on your day

Catching up

I haven't posted for a few days so I will try to catch y'all up on my life  :)

Noah's team won their 3rd game Tuesday night.  They are starting to look pretty solid.  We don't play again until Saturday which will give them time to rest up and get some practices in.

I was out of work yesterday as the boy didn't feel well.  Got a call from the school about 10 and had to go pick him up.  Whatever it was, it passed quickly as he felt a lot better by lunch time.  I got a replacement Nook yesterday as well.  My first one developed a crack in the case.  B&N did pretty well with their warranty service.  :o)

Emma still doesn't feel great, she has had a sore throat for a week now plus she had the team from hell yesterday at work.

Now I need to catch up on email and review my task list for the day.  May your day be blessed

Our First Win

The Red Sox won Saturday night 13-12 (they called the game as soon as the winning run crossed the plate).  I worked Saturday night and it was ugly.  Was online off and on most of the night.  It took until 1 pm Sunday before my colleague and I stabilized the systems.  It made Sunday a bit surreal as I was running on almost no sleep at all.

Emma is working on coordinating Easter in Clovis this year.   Aaron volunteered to host it at his townhouse even though he has no furniture (actually, that may be a good thing).  We have our 3rd game tomorrow night and then we play again on Thursday.  This time of year is very busy for us as we are out of the house 5-6 nights a week until baseball season finishes in early June.

And I choose not to say anything about Federally Funded (with my tax dollars) health care

Quiet Days

It has been quiet and peaceful so far today at work.  Last night Noah had his first game where, unfortunately, we got beat by the Giant's.  Noah did well behind the plate but only got one "at-bat" during the game.  Saturday night we play late (7:30) so will be bundling up to stay warm.  Later in the year we will really enjoy having games under the lights after the sun goes down and the temperatures cool off.

This weekend is supposed to be nice so I will take advantage and start working on the garden  :o)  Noah has pictures Sunday after church for his team (during the middle of P's b-day party - go figure).

I will try to pop in over the weekend and let you know how the game goes.

blessing on your day

He Promised

God's promises never fail - we are told this time and again in the Word.  Yet this is one of the easiest things to forget.  When circumstances don't go the way we hope/plan/desire, we can lose sight of God's promises.  When we are in the midst of the fire or in a trial it is easy to lose hope and give in to despair.  The promises of God can, at times, seem out of reach - the result of a pipe dream or fantasy.  Yet we are told over and over that He always keeps His Word and that His promises never, ever fail.

Sometimes we doubt - we doubt the "plan," the promise or even that God is paying attention.  One of the reasons for this might be feeling uncertain regarding God's plan and promises.  For many of the situations that arise in our lives, God's plan, purpose and promises are actually quite clear.  His Word sets forth His Will quite distinctly if we take the time to read and study it.

For me, the issue comes down to one of faith and of timing.  I either have a hard time trusting - or more commonly - I feel like God isn't paying attention.  Things are not moving as fast as I like, in the direction I like or in the way that I like.  As a result I start feeling that God isn't listening or that His promises don't apply to me or my situation.  But I know (in my head)  that this simply isn't true.  Moving that belief from my head to my heart is a task that seems to be beyond my ability most days.  Fortunately God doesn't need our cooperation in order to keep His promises - no matter what our heart tells us, His promises NEVER fail.

"Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise."  Hebrews 10:23, NLT

Fill It Fast

On occasion, I have built, created or re-organized to generate additional storage - usually with a specific purpose in mind.  One thing I have noticed is always true; if you don't use the storage immediately for what it was intended, it quickly fills up with other things.  This holds true whether it is the new shelf you built in the garage to hold paint cans, the cupboard you cleared out to hold Tupperware or the spot in your closet for your tee-shirts.

The same holds true in our hearts, minds and souls.  There is a "God-shaped" hole in our hearts.  We need to keep it filled up with the things of God.  If we don't, we start to accumulate other things there - possessions, relationships, hobbies or even addictions.  Sometimes we recognize this and take steps to "clean it out" and restore it to the intended purpose.  But if we don't make it a priority to keep it filled with the things of God, it quickly refills with the stuff you just took out (and more).

Luke 11:24-26 “When an evil spirit leaves a person, it goes into the desert, searching for rest. But when it finds none, it says, ‘I will return to the person I came from.’ So it returns and finds that its former home is all swept and in order. Then the spirit finds seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they all enter the person and live there. And so that person is worse off than before.”

Erin Go Bragh!

Happy St. Patrick's Day, my friends, family and casual readers  :)